Estimated read time: 4-5 minutes
MAPLETON — Fourteen years ago, Ashley Hone held her newborn son in her arms with the knowledge that she only had minutes before she would need to say goodbye. Kingston was a twin, who, at 20 weeks gestation, was diagnosed with trisomy 18, which in most cases is fatal.
Kingston lived for 73 minutes, which was long enough for his parents to hold, bathe and love him completely for the duration of his little life. It was the loving aftercare Hone received, including bereavement counseling and the ability to bury her son, that has been a driving force for her to provide the same for other grieving parents.
Today, Hone is a bereavement specialist for Intermountain Healthcare in Utah County, working with parents who experience miscarriage and infant loss. She draws from her personal experience while catering to the individual needs of those she works with.
Knowing that this is one little thing that I can do that can bring some kind of comfort to these parents and help ease some of the pain has been a driving force behind what I do.
–Michaun Torgersen
"We were so grateful that we got to hold Kingston for his whole life," Hone said. "We knew beforehand he was going to pass away, and I just wanted to give him a bath. This was my one time to parent him, and it may seem so simple and mundane, but I only got one chance to do it.
"I had somebody come in and help me and provide all these services for me, which were so huge in my healing," she continued. "As the years went on, it was always in the back of my mind that this was what I wanted to do. I wanted to give families the opportunity to do parenting things like these."
Hone assists parents after stillbirth, early infant loss and miscarriages as early as 12 weeks gestation. She and a team of individuals, who often volunteer their services, provide many things to bereaved parents, including hand and foot molds, as well as photos of the infants.
A service that holds a special place in her heart is providing parents clothing in which to bury their children. These clothes are created from items that would ordinarily be sitting in the back of someone's closet.
They're made from donated wedding dresses.
Made with love
The volunteer who creates these items of clothing is Michaun Torgersen, of Spanish Fork, who said helping grieving parents is also something she holds dear. For the past eight years, Torgersen has been making this special burial clothing including "cocoons" for the tiniest babies. She said she couldn't do it without donated time and clothing items.
Like Hone, Torgersen also has a personal tie to early infant loss.
"I've had a miscarriage, and I've watched my older sister have about seven or eight miscarriages," Torgersen recalled. "My mom lost a baby about 52 years ago, and what's really heartbreaking to me is that back then, they took the baby. My mother never got to see what that baby was. She never knew the gender. Absolutely nothing. They just took the baby, and she doesn't know what they even did with it. She never got to hold it. I just can't imagine not knowing and not being able to bury that baby."
Torgersen, who also teaches sewing lessons and creates memory bears for families who have lost loved ones, says sewing clothes for grieving parents has been a special experience.
"This project really means a lot to me, to know that these parents will have something that they can bury their babies in," she said. "Knowing that this is one little thing that I can do that can bring some kind of comfort to these parents and help ease some of the pain has been a driving force behind what I do.
Hone and Torgersen have teamed up, creating a Facebook page titled, "My Angel Baby Project" to assist with donations and community outreach. Torgersen makes all of the outfits from donated wedding dresses and other donated materials such as buttons, lace and velcro. Due to the number of items needed, Torgersen has asked members of the community to assist with sewing. She said she has been touched by those who have reached out, wanting to help.
"I've cried several times over this past week because of the huge response; I've been really blown away," she said. "I've had several people come to my house to pick up dresses and patterns to start cutting. I've had people offer to sew, which has been wonderful. I've had leaders of groups contact me and offer to get a group together. I'm just amazed how many people want to help with this project."
Torgersen said the idea behind making the clothing out of wedding dresses was simple.
"A lot of people don't use their wedding dresses anymore and they're just sitting there," she explained. "It's also something white and pure, and these babies are pure."
Hone and Torgersen said they aren't taking any monetary donations at the moment, but are still actively seeking wedding dresses, material and individuals willing to sew. Anyone who would like to donate items or services can find more information on "My Angel Baby Project" on Facebook, or email Myangelbabyproject@gmail.com.
